Monday, August 17, 2015

To the Fairy with the Heavy Heart

Dear Fairy with the Heavy Heart,

I had you on my mind today. You and your sad eyes, your disappointments and your shattered fairy dreams. The lightness of your wings wasted due to this burden you still carry in your heart. How are you, dear Fairy? Hope you have found some new dreams, hope you have seen different lights and colors, hope you are still aiming to fly high. 

Today, sweet Fairy, I found a gift for you. Gifts, dear Fairy, do not solve all our troubles, do not save us from darkness. But some gifts when they are meant to be ours can bring joy, can bring the hope of joy. I'm sure you know this, dear Fairy, 'cause fairies, even the ones with the heavy hearts do know of love and gifts.  Aren't the fairies the ones bringing princesses the gifts of beauty, love and grace? 

I found a gift for you, dear Fairy. I found it while I walked to work today, while I thought of unpaid bills and unfinished projects. It was there among the little things scattered along the way. The little things never fail, dear Fairy. And today, it was there, a gift for you. 

A dress, dear Fairy. I found a dress for you! You may be thinking, sweet Fairy, why you would need this dress. And you're right! You don't! You don't need it as you don't need the moon in the sky to look at, the stars shining bright when the moon isn't there. You don't need it, like you don't need songs and books, stories and poetry, colours and flavors or memories that make you cry and smile all at once. You don't need it, yet you do! Let me tell you about it and remember, dear Fairy, it's a gift: My gift to you.   

Let's just talk about the dress, dear Fairy, the dress which is my gift to you. It has a strapless green top that can leave your wings free when you decide to fly away, when you decide it's finally time to leave your sorrows behind. It is the green of new leaves, of green grass in the early hours of the morning.  It will look marvelous on you! The skirt, dear Fairy,  is yet another thing completely. Light and delicate! It's simply dreamy! The white petals and the rosy veins, the movement of it,  I can almost see you dancing around in it, when you decide, dear Fairy that is time to be free, that it's time to be happy again. 

I am sure, dear Fairy, that  it would seem close to nothing to the eyes of the bypassers, but to you, dear Fairy, I'm sure it will fit perfectly. What a beautiful gown you'll have! You can wear it to dance under the moonlight. You can wear it for a walk under the Sun. You can wear it to remind you of the beauty in the world of the love you once felt, of the hopes you once had. You can wear it to remind yourself that it is all still there, that you can find it all inside you, that you can dance and you can dream, when you welcome a gift and you understand that it is just for you, that it fits only you, that it's as beautiful as you. 

Dear Fairy with the heavy heart, I found this dress for you today and I hope you will have it. Wear it when searching for the lost lightness, for the lost joy, for the brightness and colours you once saw in the world. Let this little thing be the first step, a dancing step into the light, once again. 

Love, 

Me


Tuesday, August 11, 2015

Vestido de Fada (Para minhas meninas)

De branca flor rosada
faz-se uma saia de fada
Pequenas pétalas
Seriam nada
Mas para a fada
Até os pés
Toda rodada

Verde tomara que caia
Cor de caule
Não, não caia!
Para a fada,
de flor, a longa saia

Seria nada
Não fosse a fada
Seria nada
Não fosse o sonho

Sapatos de luar
Para a fada
Brilho de Estrela
Nos cachos revoltos
De fada animada
Luz de Sol
no olhar da fada

Dança, Fada!
Rodopia!
Abre os braços
Solta o corpo
Em seu lindo vestido de flor


Friday, August 7, 2015

It's ok to be in pieces! (The words to go with the image)

"It's ok to be in pieces!", I told myself today. It's ok to be in pieces as long as you still have a core. As long as there is still a thread connecting the fragments of you. It doesn't even have to be a thick thread, you know? Any thread will do. 

A while ago,  I saw a quote by Emma Watson, the young Harry Potter's Hermione, and she was saying that she finally knew who she was. "Wow!", I thought at first, "She's so young and already knows who she is! I'm 43 and I have no idea!" That quote haunted me for a while. It remained in the back of my mind.  It made me look back at the paths I've walked, the crossroads and corners I've stood at, contemplating traffic, speeding up or slowing down, the steep roads I had to struggle to run, or drag myself through, and the many moments I've remained there, contemplating green and red traffic lights, simply refusing to budge. 

I remembered sometimes too when I really knew who I was. They did last for a while until I did not know anymore. "That's probably where Emma Watson must be!", I thought. She now knows who she is. What she doesn't know, yet, is that this knowing is temporary. 

The knowing who you are is temporary if you have a searching soul, if you make questions, if you look for answers. The more answers you find, the more questions you have. The more you walk, the more places you go to, the more music you listen, the more books you read, the more you change, if you have a searching soul.  The more people you meet, the more you carefully listen, look, talk, the more you are not you anymore and the more you are the core of you still. 

Contemplating this picture I took a while ago, I can see that I'm not even the same that took the picture. Then, these scattered pieces of a fallen golden leaf moved me, touched me, but there were no words to go with them. Looking at this image, today, the words poured out and I heard this voice telling me: "It's ok to be in pieces!" I understand now that Emma Watson knows who she is and  I'm glad she does.  I do hope she will be ok too when one day she finds she doesn't. I've known who I was many times. I do not know who I am right now. Perhaps I will never know it again. Except from the core of me, I am these little fragments of many different dreams, loves and lives. And it's ok! It's ok to be in pieces!